


Jumping the Broom

by xRabbitx



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Bottom Roadhog | Mako Rutledge, Humor, M/M, Rimming, Wedding Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 09:12:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9378035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xRabbitx/pseuds/xRabbitx
Summary: Junkrat and Roadhog are getting married, and Hana has made all kinds of plans for the wedding. But a well-planned wedding isn't exactly in the Junker tradition...





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cap_Chameleon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cap_Chameleon/gifts).



> This is just a quick little thing I threw together, because we all know the junk boys need to tie the knot! It was originally inspired by a drawing by Cap_Chameleon, so I'm gifting this fic to them :)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

*

 

It's a little unclear when this became a whole thing, but it definitely is a whole thing now, and it's honestly freaking Junkrat out a little. It wasn't supposed to be a big deal at all, but somehow everyone else found out about it and turned it into a big deal. Hog isn't complaining, but Junkrat can tell from the slight twitch of his right eye that he's becoming increasingly irritated by it all. The problem is that it's the first time someone within the group is getting hitched, and to everyone's surprise, those two someones turn out to be Junkrat and Roadhog. The junkers are pretty surprised by it themselves, because it really wasn't in the cards for them, and it really, really wasn't supposed to be a big deal; there wasn't even a proper proposal. In fact, Junkrat can't even remember how the decision came about—it just did some day, and Junkrat and Roadhog are both happy with their decision until that day where Junkrat accidentally mentions it to Hana. Hana positively flips out, and before Junkrat or Roadhog can do anything about it, the entire team knows about it, and the deal, which was supposed to be very small, just keeps getting bigger and bigger.

     At first it's just supposed to be the two of them—how exactly they're going to pull it off, since they're both technically still wanted criminals, is unplanned—but then Hana enters the mix and insists on throwing them a party. And then she starts dragging the others into it as well; she has commissioned Hanzo and Genji to do flowers ("Of course flowers are gay! Just like you guys, numbskull!"), Lúcio to do the music ("Duh! Who else?"), Gabriel to do their suits ("Did you see his Halloween costume? It was awesome!"), Reinhardt to do the cake ("No idea how he makes those cakes with his giant hands, but they're really pretty!"), Ana and Phara to do the food ("Maḥshi, yum!"), Jack to do the toastmaster duty ("If anyone can keep all these people in line…"), and finally Jesse to do the booze ("I've already told him that he should bring more than just whiskey!"). Before Junkrat and Roadhog can think twice, there has grown a giant party up around them, and that really wasn't the plan…

 

*

 

     "I'm not doing this," Roadhog says and slams his book down on the table hard enough to make Junkrat jump and almost drop the small screwdriver he's been using to tighten the joints of his arm.

     "Honestly never knew why you even began, mate," Junkrat says, putting the screwdriver down and flexing his metal fingers. "Readin’ always makes me head hurt."

     "Not talking about reading," Roadhog tells him, shaking his head. "Talking about that whole wedding thing."

     "Oh." Junkrat's nearly constant grin falls a bit. "Yer—yer havin’ second thoughts there, Hogs?"

     "No. I never wanted this to begin with," Roadhog grunts.

     Junkrat's sooty, little heart drops in his chest, and he suddenly doesn't know where to look. "That's fine, I s’pose," he says, swallowing hard. "Reckon I must've misunderstood ya. But—" he looks up at Roadhog, "we can still be partners, right?"

     Roadhog blinks. "What're you talking about?"

     "Just, y'know," Junkrat says with a small laugh and a shrug that's supposed to show that he's totally fine, which he really isn't, because the only person he's ever cared about it apparently leaving him. "Just 'cause yer breakin’ up with me, we can still do business together, right?"

     "What're you on about? I'm not breaking up with you."

     "But I thought—you said—!"

     "I'm talking about that whole shit show that Hana is doing, you idiot. I still wanna get hitched, just not the way everyone else wants us to."

     It's Junkrat's time to just blink at Roadhog. Then he bursts out laughing, collapsing over the table between them and cackling so hard his eyes water.

     "Fuck me, Hogs," Junkrat gasps in between giggles, and he wipes his eyes with his flesh hand, leaving black soot smudges across his face. "I thought you was dumpin’ me."

     "Don't be ridiculous," Roadhog grunts and leans back in his creaking chair to pat his belly. Junkrat knows what this means, and he crawls over the table to settle in Roadhog's lap, snuggling against his belly. Roadhog doesn't do cuddly very often—even though Junkrat tries goading him into it at every chance he gets, which is all the time—but when he does, it's the best. Junkrat positively purrs when Roadhog's big arms curl around him.

     "Almost broke me little heart there, mate," Junkrat hums, idly poking at the barbell through Roadhog's nipple and watching as said nipple hardens a bit.

     "Don't be ridiculous," Roadhog just repeats and gives Junkrat a couple of gentle pats on his hair. Roadhog has never been good at non-sexual physical affection, but that's okay, because he tries, and Junkrat is affectionate enough for both of them anyway. "Why would I do that?"

     "I dunno," Junkrat says with a shrug and twists around in Roadhog's lap so he can straddle it. Roadhog is too big for Junkrat to reach all the way up to his face like this, so Junkrat just presses a series of kisses against Roadhog's chest instead. "Maybe you finally got sick of me."

     "All these years together haven't made me sick of you, and by now I'm pretty sure no amount of years ever will," Roadhog hums with a soft sigh.

     "You're such a bloody romantic," Junkrat giggles, sliding his hands over Roadhog's chest to pinch both his nipples. Roadhog shivers slightly under his touch.

     "Is that a complaint?" Roadhog asks, pushing his massive hands up the legs of Junkrat's shorts to squeeze the top of his thighs.

     "Not really," Junkrat snickers, shoving his hips forward a bit so he can grind up against Roadhog's belly. "It's cute."

     "You know what else is cute?"

     "What?"

     "The noises you make."

     "What noises?"

     "These," Roadhog hums and lifts Junkrat up and turns him around so he's facing the table with his back to Roadhog. Then he pushes Junkrat down, draping him over the table while tugging open Junkrat's shorts and pulling them down to expose his pale ass. Junkrat squirms and giggles, instantly arching his back and spreading his legs like a cat in heat.

     "These noises?" Junkrat asks, turning his head to look over his shoulder at Roadhog.

     "Those are pretty good, yeah," Roadhog mumbles, stroking his hands over Junkrat's ass and spreading him open a bit. "These ones are better, though."

     Junkrat shivers when he hears Roadhog push the chair back, and he leans his head down to rest his forehead against the tabletop, waiting for what he knows is about to happen. And there it is; a warm, wet tongue drags all the way up from his balls, over his taint, and up to tease his hole. Junkrat whines in delight and arches his back even more into what probably looks like an extremely obscene position, but Junkrat doesn't give a shit. He mewls like a cat and rocks his hips, trying to shove back against Roadhog's warm tongue. Roadhog lets him do it, squeezing Junkrat's buttocks with both hands while circling and teasing the ring of muscle with the tip of his tongue.

     "S-shit, Hoggy, feels amazin’," Junkrat breathes out, biting his bottom lip as he reaches down between his thighs to jerk himself off in sync with the movements of Roadhog's tongue.

     "Stoff fhaf."

     "Ngh'what?"

     Roadhog pulls away and repeats, "Stop that."

     "Stop what?"

     "Stop wanking yourself off. You're gonna need it in a little bit."

     "I am?"

     "Yeah."

     "Alright, but keep talking," Junkrat grins, taking his hand off his dick. "Felt good."

     "What do you want me to say?"

     "I dunno, anything you want."

     Roadhog grunts and leans in again, pushing the flat of his tongue against Junkrat's hole, which sends a spike of pleasure straight to Junkrat's cock.

     "Australians all let us rejoice, for we are young and free," Roadhog half-sings, and the vibrations of his deep voice make Junkrat's body feel electric. "We've golden soil and wealth for toil, our home is girt by sea. Our land abounds in nature's gifts, of beauty rich and rare…"

     Although it feels amazing, there's absolutely no way Junkrat is going to keep a straight face while having the Australian national anthem sung into his ass, and he doubles over on the table, laughing so hard it makes his stomach ache. Roadhog laughs, too, which makes the whole thing seem even more ridiculous, because he's laughing straight into Junkrat's ass. They both laugh so much that they forget about sex for a while, and instead they relocate to the couch.

The room they have at the base is better than any room they've ever stayed in before, and Junkrat still doesn't really feel comfortable in it. Everything's so soft and clean—when they moved in here, he spent a good couple of nights sleeping on the floor, because the bed was too soft for him. There's a huge TV, too, but they never watch it. Roadhog is more interested in reading, and Junkrat has never had a TV, so it seems a bit weird to him to just sit passively by while your brain comes to standstill. His brain never stands still, and the few times he's tried watching TV, he got distracted in minutes. Some of the others—mostly Hana—have asked them if they don't get bored, but Junkrat is rarely bored. If he's not actively doing something, he's thinking about all the things he's going to do—all the heists he wants to pull, all the places he wants to visit, all the things he wants to do to Roadhog, all the things he wants Roadhog to do to him… Why would he need a TV when he's got a constant stream of entertainment inside his head?

"Say, Hoggy," Junkrat murmurs, stretching out his long, lean body with a grunt. "What're you reading there?"

Roadhog is lying on his belly on the couch, cheek resting on one arm while the other is dangling over the edge. He's reading a book that's lying open on the floor. Junkrat has been lying on Roadhog's back, staring up at the ceiling and quietly mumbling to himself, trying to count all the cities he's ever been in. Now, however, he rolls over so he's lying on his belly on Roadhog's back—still naked by the way.

"Moby-Dick," Roadhog grunts.

"Really? They wrote a book about me donger?" Junkrat snorts, and although he can't see Roadhog's face, he just knows that Roadhog is rolling his eyes. "I mean, it is pretty impressive, I'll give you that. But a whole book…"

"You're an idiot," Roadhog sighs without taking his eyes off the book.

"Sure about that, mate?"

"Pretty damn sure."

"Hah! Then _yer_ the bigger idiot for marryin’ an idiot like me!"

"Fine, we're both idiots," Roadhog grunts, and Junkrat can tell that he wants to go back to reading. Junkrat, however, isn't in the mood for any more quiet time. He shoves a hand down the back of Roadhog's pants to give his ass a squeeze. Roadhog doesn't react, which is a good sign, because if he weren't in the mood, he'd tell Junkrat to cut it out. But Roadhog just keeps reading, so Junkrat does it again. Roadhog's ass is nice, firm, and round, and Junkrat chews on his bottom lip for a moment before leaning down to start trailing kisses along the back of Roadhog's shoulder. That earns him a soft grunt, which eggs him on. He reaches out to find the bottle of lube next to the couch—they have both learned the hard way to always have lube handy no matter where they are—then smacks Roadhog's ass and says, "Up."

Roadhog obediently lifts his ass so Junkrat can push his pants down and bare his magnificent bottom. It's smooth and a little paler than the rest of Roadhog's otherwise light brown skin, and Junkrat takes a moment to admire it while he slicks up his flesh fingers. He also takes great pleasure in the way Roadhog's broad arches a little when Junkrat's slick fingers between his buttocks to rub over his hole.

"Like that, do ya?" he whispers, leaning down continue his trail of kisses across Roadhog's shoulders. Roadhog doesn't reply, but his muscles clamp down around Junkrat's fingers when they push inside, and the feeling makes Junkrat's semi-hard dick twitch between his legs.

One of the many things Junkrat enjoys about the difference in size between him and Roadhog is that Roadhog doesn't need half as much prep as Junkrat does for sex, simply because Junkrat is so much smaller. It's a good thing, too, because Junkrat's patience is about as long as his pinky.

"Bloody hell, Hoggers," Junkrat breathes against Roadhog's skin as he adds a second finger. "Yer makin’ me toeyer than a roman sandal."

"If you're gonna use slang, I'm not letting you fuck me," Roadhog grunts.

"Sorry," Junkrat grins. "Ya good?"

"Yeah."

Junkrat withdraws his fingers, then positions himself, sitting up and straddling the back of Roadhog's muscular thighs. He bites his bottom lip as he steadies his cock and slides it between Roadhog's buttocks, pushing against the muscle. They let out a collective groan as Junkrat's dick sinks into Roadhog's ass, and Junkrat has to close his eyes and slowly count to 10 not to lose it completely. He doesn't top very often, mostly because he's rarely in the mood for it, but when he is, it feels amazing. Roadhog seems to think so, too, because when Junkrat finally opens his eyes and watches as his dick slides in and out of Roadhog's ass, Roadhog has buried his face in a pillow like he's shy about the noises he's making.

"Fuckfuckfuckfuck—fuck, Hoggy," Junkrat grunts out. He moves increasingly faster, digging his fingers into Roadhog's meaty buttocks so hard that he's pretty sure he's going to leave bruises. He can feel the muscles flexing under his fingers, and it only turns him on even more. It turns him on so much, that it doesn't take more than a couple of minutes before he's coming; with a shuddering moan, Junkrat doubles over and collapses onto Roadhog's back, babbling about how much he loves Roadhog, while his dick jerks and pumps Roadhog full of thick, warm spunk.

 

*

 

Junkrat's jaw and throat are still sore a few days later when they storm the priest's office guns blazing—not that he's regretted letting Roadhog basically skullfuck him after he had climaxed the other night, because it was hot. The priest leaps up from behind his desk, a look of absolute terror on his face.

     "W-what's this?"

     "Sorry, mate!" Junkrat grins, casually waving his grenade launcher in the priest's direction. "Ya see, me partner and I has a job for ya, and seein’ as we're both wanted criminals, conventional ways just ain't right for us."

     "A job?" The priest cowers, pressing himself up against the wall as Junkrat and Roadhog close in on him.

     "Looks like we got a clever one, Hogs!" Junkrat snickers and straightens up before grabbing the priest by the scruff of his neck. He likes to straighten up before he gets physical, because some people mistakenly think he's a small guy and try to resist.

     "Yeah, a job, alright," Junkrat tells the priest as he drags him off towards the door. "Just a small one. Won't take long, and we'll be real nice to ya if ya do as yer told."

     "T-this is a house of God!" the priest whimpers in protest. "Please—"

     "Exactly!" Junkrat sing-songs. "We wanted to keep things a bit formal. Gotta do this right."

     The priest whimpers as Junkrat drags him down the stairs to the chapel itself, but he doesn't resist, because it's obvious that it would be futile. Junkrat drags him all the way up to the altar where he releases him.

     "What are y-you planning to do?" the priest splutters, shielding the altar like he thinks Junkrat and Roadhog are going to do something to it. "Please, this is a sacred place of worship!"

     "Yeah, yeah, ya already said that," Junkrat huffs, getting a little impatient. Roadhog is quiet like he usually is during their exploits, but he's busy fiddling with something in one of his pockets.

"Like I said," Junkrat continues, grinning and pointing a finger at the priest. "We've got a job for ya. See, me partner and I wanna get hitched, and yer gonna do it."

     "…what?" The priest looks like he forgets to be scared for a moment.

     Junkrat huffs. "We wanna get hitched! Tie the knot! Take the plunge! Jump the broom! Get married!" 

     The priest just stares at him. "You're—together?"

     "Crikey! Yes!" Junkrat groans, rolling his eyes. "It's obvious, innit? How is this always a surprise?"

     "I-I don't know, I just thought—" the priest stammers, but he's interrupted by Roadhog growling at him.

     "Listen, father, if you'd like to keep praying with all your fingers intact, you should quit the asking and start the marrying."

     "Right!" Junkrat chimes in, curling himself around Roadhog's massive right arm. "Hop to it!"

     "You realize it won't be legal, right?"

     "I don't bloody care!" Junkrat yells, truly losing his patience. "Nothing 'bout us is legal! Get to it or this place ain’t gonna be standin’ much longer!"

     "D-dearly beloved!" the priest cries, looking like he's about to simultaneously cry and piss himself. "We-we're gathered here tod—"

     "Wait, wait!" Junkrat interrupts him and rummages through his pockets. He finds a pretty broken and wilted bunch of flowers and proudly hands them to Roadhog. "Picked 'em meself!"

     If Roadhog's face wasn't covered by his mask, Junkrat is sure there would be a bright pink flush visible on Roadhog cheeks.

     "Uh, dearly beloved," the priest begins again, "we're gathered here in the sight of God, and in the face of this company, to join together these men in holy matrimony."

     Junkrat turns to face Roadhog, and he takes Roadhog's hands, holding them tightly while beaming up at him and not really listening to what the priest is saying. Because, no, it's doesn't matter at all if this is legal or not; it's for them, and them alone, and all the rules, the flowers, the cakes, and the planning can go straight to hell. This is just for them.

     "And so I ask you, uh—"

     "Mako."

     "Right. And so I ask you, Mako, will you take—"

     "Jamie."

     "Will you take Jamie as your wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Will you love him, comfort him, honor, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep you only unto him, so long as you both shall live?"

     "Yes," Roadhog grunts, and Junkrat's heart does a somersault inside his chest, and he swears he's going to cry.

     "And Jamie, will you take Mako as your—"

     "Ya bet yer bloody bloomers I will!"

     Junkrat can see the corners of Roadhog's eyes wrinkle like they always do when he smiles.

     "Do you have the rings?" the priest asks, yanking Junkrat out of his happy daze.

     "Uh, rings?" Junkrat asks stupidly. He had forgotten all about rings, and just as he’s about to panic, Roadhog shows him what he had been fiddling with earlier. There are two gold bands lying on his palm, a small one and a big one.

     "Oh, Hoggy!" Junkrat swoons. "That's what ya was out getting’ yesterday?"

     "Yeah," Roadhog hums, and he hands the big one to Junkrat.

     "Then, uh, please exchange rings."

     Roadhog takes the small ring and puts it on Junkrat's flesh ring finger, and Junkrat does the same to Roadhog. It looks a bit strange, suddenly having a ring on his finger, but looking at it makes Junkrat feel so happy he doesn't really know what to do with himself.

     "I-I now pronounce you husband and, uh, husband."

     Junkrat leaps up at Roadhog, curling his arms around his thick neck, and kisses the front of his mask. Roadhog chuckles and pushes his mask up just enough so they can kiss properly. Junkrat is so intensely happy that he hardly even notices (and definitely doesn't care) that the priest withdraws and runs away—probably barricading himself in his office and calling the peelers.

 

*

 

     "Bloody hell, Hana's pretty angry," Junkrat snorts, showing Roadhog the very long and very foul-mouthed text he's gotten in response to his "nvm the party just tied the knot :D" text from a few minutes earlier.

     "Whatever," Roadhog grunts with a shrug. "This is for us, not her."

     "Couldn't have said it better meself!" Junkrat grins, and he climbs up on the seat on Roadhog's bike so he can drape himself over Roadhog's shoulder. He holds up the phone and snaps a photo of them both, grinning at the camera and showing their ringed fingers, then sends it to Hana.

     "Right!" he says, putting the phone away. "Where d'ya wanna go for our honeymoon?"

     "Somewhere warm with beaches and cocktails," Roadhog replies as he kicks the engine of his bike into roaring life.

     "Right-o, mate! Let's just head south and see where the road takes us!"

     Junkrat settles in the sidecar, beaming up at his new husband as they roar down the street and into the sunset.

 

*

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I hope you'll leave a kudos/comment if you liked the fic :)
> 
> If you'd like to stay updated on my fic adventures, please follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/drrtyrabbit) or [Tumblr](https://rabbitvswonderland.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
